Advice For Expats Everywhere.....

Uncle Remus and Friends (goole images)

"Boy,


what ever you is and where ever you is,


don’t be what you ain’t,


because when you is what you ain’t,


you isn’t."

 ~Uncle Remus

...and I’m sure you all know who I’m referring to!

http://thenovelladyfingers.wordpress.com

http://gingersnapsanovel.wordpress.com/

The Fresh Prince, Sammi and Election 2012!

We tend to rent or buy our French movies because we find it rather penible to sit through a French movie in the theater.  When one considers the various regional accents, dialects and all, I usually use the hearing impaired mode as well, to help me along.

Sometimes a French movie plot line vaguely echoes a popular American movie or television series.  When this happens, it is an absolute guarantee that I will see the movie.  I am never disappointed by the fact that there is always a wildly divergent approach to what on initial impact would seem a similar issue.  One such movie is Agathe Clery, which most Americans could assume is a take on American filmmaker Melvin Van Peebles' Watermelon Man. 

Another example of this Gallic wink towards American issues is the film I saw recently, Neuilly Sa Mère.


Years ago there was a popular television series, called Fresh Prince of Bel Air.  Actor,Will Smith, starred as a teenager growing up in the "hood" of Philadelphia.  After a scary gang rumble, his mother sends him off to live with his aunt and uncle who live in the wealthy town of Bel Air in California.

In Neuilly Sa Mère, adorable young actor, Samy Saghir, stars in this hilarious film about the pretentions and dysfunctions of the bourgeoisie...or the upper classes...I still have trouble with the distinctions, here in this Socialist country.  After all, I'm from a Capitalist one, where the classes, these days are ironically rather...flou...in comparison.

Fourteen-year-old Sami, lives with his father and mother in a housing project in a working class and immigrant neighborhood in Chalon-sur-Saône in the Burgundy region of France.  Unlike the American Fresh Prince, whose old neighborhood is ruled by gang violence, through Sammi's eyes, his "hood" is a vertitable multi-cultural and ethnic paradise...Kumbaya and such... you see.

His father drops dead of a heart attack as a result of over-identifying with and over-reacting to a Soccer game.  His mother is forced to take a job on a boat, so she sends Sammi to her sister and husband who live in the affluent Paris suburb of  Neuilly.

Hence the title.

Oh, by the way, Sami and his family are Beur...North African Moslims.

I'm not quite clear whether both Sammi's aunt and uncle are both Beur or in an intercultural/ racial marriage. Perhaps I missed it in my translation, since it is obvious that his aunt is North African, but his uncle, you see, is a Pork distributor.

The most amusing aspect of this tale, when I compare it to The Fresh Prince, is that while Will Smith's character arrogantly flaunts his ghetto savvy and lords over the naive, marerialistic and self-centered members of his extended family, Sammi encounters bullys and thugs of proportions previously unimaginable in the exclusive enclave of some of France's future leaders.  His young cousin,Charles, with whom he must share a bedroom, is Right Wing, has political ambions and aspires to become President of the Republic.

Get it?

If you should choose to accept the challenge of watching French political satire, I'm sure you'll agree that the political references in this story are not exactly all that nuanced.  Even an Anglophone foreigner like myself would get the joke...I mean...message.

It'll make you look up the backgrounds of our 2012  Presidential candidates, which is never...ever a bad idea.

This is why I  read "Dreams From My Father" before I decided to cast my vote for President Obama.


No surprises.  No regrets. 

POACHING FOR EUROS: Part 1

First, I would like to emphasize that this Post is targeted specifically to American women in France, and those looking to live in France…actually to American woman everywhere.

Not long ago, I was having lunch with some American women who happened to be married to or living with French men. They were exploring the reasons for the difficulties in developing friendships with French women.

Reasons explored ranged from “they tend to make their friends in elementary school» or “they are so busy with their raising their families and cooking gourmet meals for their men, or “they are not as liberated as American women…they close their eyes to their men’s affairs” to “I am so intimidated by those stylish French women and their chic, black ensembles.”

It made me reflect on the numerous books on the allure of French women published by Anglophones.

After indulging in a conversation and theories that went nowhere, we changed the subject, finished lunch after which I returned home to the comfy familiarity of my American husband.

Later that day, I looked up books on Amazon.fr to see whether French women extolled the feistiness, progressive and liberated openness… or anything else positive at all…about the American woman.

I found nothing!

Nothing titled, “Unlock Your Inner American Woman”, “Those Lucky American Chicks Who Mostly Sleep Alone,” or even “The American Amazons of the Women’s Liberation Movement: What On Earth Is Their Secret?”.

Again...absolutely nothing.

(Perhaps some of you out there might be able to name a few for me). It simply appeared to me that here was no reciprocal interest between French and American women, regarding anything! Not even PMS.

Over the years I’ve met French women who expressed in subtle and diplomatic ways a curiosity of what the attraction American women had for their lifestyles…French cuisine and politesse, notwithstanding… and their men, in particular. It seemed to them that we, American women, had access to more wealth, comforts and gorgeous men of such diversity that it was globally enviable. Or so they said.

I kid you not!

It’s no wonder that thousands upon thousands of French women every year clandestinely flock to Greenwich (Village), San Francisco and Disney World in search of the American Woman’s secret allure and wonderful quality of life!

But then…I digress…

Although, I can personally understand the unpredictable power of love and the unpredictability of where one might unearth a lover or mate in this big wide world, I can also understand the ominous consequences of choosing a life partner from a tribe whose women are an unknown entity to a newcomer.

When a woman enters a foreign culture she instantly acquires the status of the women of that culture. Remember that.

On impact, I might look like a poacher, myself. However, my girly- girl posse, prior to marriage and for most of my life, actually, consisted of primarily members of the tribe among whom I eventually found my mate. It was inevitable that I would end up marrying one of the members of their family. I had been acculturated by the population of that particular tribe already and was quite familiar with the nuances of the male-female relationships within that tribe.

My advice to my American sisters: Do some serious research. Put romantic notions on the back burner...especially after your sweet sixteenth birthday. Read up on American foreign relations… think twice before poaching. It could prove hazardous to one's emotional, financial, social and spiritual well being.

Of course, that is unless one is a War or Mail Order Bride. Then that’s a whole ‘nother story…n’est-ce-pas?

"P.C." and the Global Community

It's kind of a cloudy day down here in the South, today.  I'm not feeling too productive, so I've just been lazing around, surfing the net.

I just came across the most amusing images of  "mappying sterotypes".

I’ve always considered my self a bit of an ethnic connoisseur.  Any person who has had the privilege of living among others in foreign countries should find it quite easy to distinguish between an ethnic connoisseur and a racist clod.

An ethnic connoisseur is merely a keen and well informed social observer.

A clod is the one who hides behind pretentions of “political correctness” while rancid bones of negativity issue from his lips landing in everyone’s plate at the dinner party

You all know who I’m talking about, I’m sure.

Anyway, check these out.   For a clearer view go to   alphadesigner.com/mapping stereotypes.

Europe according to the French

Europe according to the Greeks

Europe According to the Americans

The World according to the Americans

The World According to Israel:

and my all time favorite...

Europe according to the Vatican!

Fun, right?

On target, you think?

Nevertheless, let me offer you a piece of diplomatic advice on stereotyping: Don’t dish it if you can’t take it!

ELECTION 2012: France

Sometimes, I feel a little queezie.  Especially on days when I allow my self to contemplate too profoundly on my life, here,  in France.  I start wondering what will become of us (my husband and I) since we have placed our destiny in the hands of these people:

  

 Nevertheless, each time I slip into a mood of apprehension in this regard, I run across a statement  like this in the media from the United States:

"But I'm telling you that I'm worried and very, very concerned today when a mother, speaking about her son being in jail, says, 'I'm happy he's in a safe place.'  You cannot take that casually!"
                                                              ~Bill Cosby
                                                                in an interview with the newspaper, The Root

Maybe I’ll just call it  day and watch a French movie.  I’ll tell you all about it later.

What movie, you ask?

Filmmaker, Gabiel Jullien-Laferrière's, Neuilly Sa Mère.

A bientôt!

Bonne Année 2012 à Tous!!!

“ New years day…now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions.  Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.”

                                             ~Mark Twain

White Trash Europe, or: What the Hell Am I Doing In This Neighborhood?!?

(google images)

First let me emphasize the fact that I neither designed this Tee Shirt nor coined this phase. Nevertheless, it brings up the topic of why there are such troubling conditions and conflicts in the European Union.


For those of you who don’t know, the expression White Trash is an American English pejorative term referring to poor white people in the United States. It suggests lower social class and degraded living standards.

The definition "white trash" emphasizes the person's moral failings.

If you’re living in Europe, I think you can probably already see where I’m going with this!

I was a wide-eyed Green Horn, in the South of France, enjoying one of my first dinners chez des copains francophones, the first time I became involved in a discussion of the EU many, many years ago. To be more precise, it was sometime in the 80s.

The host and hostess and two other couples were French, the language of the dinner party was French but several other European countries were represented at the table: German, Italian, Danish, a French Swiss and then there was me…the lone American.

They explained to me how a United Europe would give them the kind of market base which would rival the US. That it would be a sort of “United States of Europe”.

Then I emphasized the fact the despite regional differences, and that although we didn’t actually have an official language, that we in the US spoke American English. They then informed me, with pride and enthusiasm, that the language of business and commerce would indeed be English.

A vague disturbance rumbled quietly among the diner guests when I asked which English they would be using in these business transactions.

No one ventured to tell me, on the other hand, which language would be that of diplomacy among their leaders.

When some said that a United Europe would protect them from “The Yellow Menace”, I wasn’t sure whether they were being sarcastic or actually being polite. Perhaps they meant someone or something else since there were no “yellows” sitting at the table.

My preference for life in France, I told them, had a lot to do with the fact that I found more compatibility with the Gallic way of life than of the Germanic definitions of order and precision or the Spanish concept of time, Belgian randomness and uncertainty, or the dubious Italian sense of business etiquette.

When I expressed my enjoyment of the diversity and uniqueness of each national culture of Europe, I was told that a United Europe would prevent war among them in the future….or something like that anyway… if I remember correctly.

It was quite an enjoyable dinner, actually, despite the fact that I could see the seeds of familiar discord among the Europeans beginning to spout.

Nevertheless, they appeared to be unanimously excited by the prospect of all of Europe going into business together in order to better compete with the Yellow Menace…whatever that is… and the economic clout of the US.

Years later, after the EU became official, I was taking a business class here in the South of France. My French business professor explained how the high level of unemployment in France was causing apathy among job seekers to the point where many had simply given up searching for employment. The City of Nice, for instance , had become a proletariat town with new residents from all over crowding into the area seeking the promise of “the Good Life”…whatever that is…

She described in great detail how the general quality in life in France for the French was “en train de dégringoler (Going into the sewer…Caput! Fini!  Bye bye!)

Then there is the issue of some snide members of the EU.

Let’s take Great Britain, for example.

How can The United Kingdom be a member in the EU when the English don’t even consider themselves in Europe: “I’m visiting Europe this summer,” or “I’m moving to Europe,” they say.

Imagine the rationality around something like this: Great Britain is composed of four countries, England, Northern Ireland, Scotland and Wales.

In additiona to all this, England doesn’t even acknowledge the importance of the Euro as their unit of monetary exchange.

They might as well let Turkey in. Who knows whether they, too, are on the continent of Europe.

The English have always cracked me up with their wily ways.

Why does Europe seem to be teetering on the edge of an abyss? Perhaps this is what happens when a population reacts to concepts of color instead of the possible incompatibilities of various cultures.


It’s also when you tear down all the picket fences protecting the privacy and sanctity of ones’ neighbours’ property.

What the EU represents to me the is the joining of the hands of a polyglot confusion of economically unequal, white people, semi-white people and wanna- be white people for absolutely no reason at all.

Just a silly deflection from more important issues.

Some things are just logical sequences of events!

http://thenovelladyfingers.wordpress.com

http://gingersnapsanovel.wordpress.com/

Ugly Words and "Jacked-Up" Concepts

photos from Google Images

Sometimes I feel that someone has vandalized the culture of the American English language, spray painted all over it. Just trampled rough shod all over the beauty, nuances and melodies of our words and expressions. Or ... perhaps I've just been romantically involved...cohabitating... with this seductive, mesmerising and thoroughly precise French language for a long, long time.

The following are some of the words that create a feeling of a whooshing whirlpool of churning acid in the pit of my stomach whenever they are uttered in my presence:

Political Correctness: (adjectivally, politically correct; both forms commonly abbreviated to PC) is a term which denotes language, ideas, policies, and behavior seen as seeking to minimize social and institutional offense in occupational, gender, racial, cultural, sexual orientation, certain other religions, beliefs or ideologies, disability, and age-related contexts, and, as purported by the term, doing so to an excessive extent.

Poppy cock on all of that! The most precise word, which has existed long before the invention of that awkward phrase would be Diplomacy. Simple diplomacy and respect toward other human beings. What does it take to grant everyone their humanity by displaying basic sensitivity? Not that complex, really.

Twitter or Tweet. An insult to birds and human beings. Personally I maintain communications with my friends, relatives and acquaintences, through letters,phone calls, cards, and emails. Birds communicate…at least the ones in my neighbourhood… though sophisticated vocal projections!

Newbie. Sound like a child’s toy, not a human being.

Venue : the locality where a crime is committed or a cause of action occurs; b. The locality or political division from which a jury is called and in which a trial is held; c. The clause within a declaration naming the locality in which a trial will be held; d. The clause in an affidavit naming the place where it was sworn to.

Mostly negative connotations...n'est-ce-pas?

Moi...I as a writer would prefer having a reading in a bookstore or an auditorium, as a painter I would show in a gallery, as a performer I would expect to appear in a nightclub, concert hall, stadium or theatre.

Who needs Venues? Sounds suspicious to me. I'd stay away from 'em, myself.

Foodie. Sounds like a word that a hungry toddler would use trying to get its parents attention.

I feel that one may be a gourmet or connoisseur, otherwise just an ordinary human being who must eat to live. On the other hand if one believes that one "lives to eat" that would mean that there is some sort of medical disorder which should be explored by a doctor of some kind…if you get my drift!

Blog. Such and ugly word. Soulds like something that would be clogging up my drain pipe.. I ‘d prefer to think of your so-called blogs as personal journals and thoughts that you choose to share with me… gifts…offerings. Something precious and beautiful.

Niggah. No matter what the spelling or context, it's ridiculoulsly insulting, unessessary and should eventually cease to exist, along with such terminologies as Honky, Spic, Kike, Wop, Chink, Wog, Bitch….etc.

Going viral : Viral marketing, viral advertising, or marketing buzz are buzzwords referring to marketing techniques that use pre-existing social networks to produce increases in brand awareness or to achieve other marketing objectives (such as product sales) through self-replicating viral processes, analogous to the spread of viruses or computer viruses...

Yada... yada... yada...yada...oh, Honey..pul-eese! The word Viral has the most horrific connotation I can image, conjuring up flu viruses, Leprocy, communicable diseases like the Bubonic Plague and A.I.D.S.

The word VIRAL had become infectuous and quite frankly, just hearing it makes me sick !

Transparency: a. Easily seen through or detected; obvious: transparent lies; .b. Free from guile; candid or open: transparent sincerity.

There is a fine line between clarity or honesty and a transparency which could render one completely vulnerable to manipulation and destruction. As in: "he/she is such a transparent fool!"

To Grow Your Jobs, Businesss or Money: If I wanted agricultural advice, I’d consult a Farmer or an Agronomist. Otherwise, I would prefer to expand my business, augment my investments, increase the number of jobs in order to restore the strength of our economy.

Often, even when someone is attempting to defend my position in some situtation I can actually feel that I am being raped by words and jargon.

For example, I recently recived a copy of a letter that my attorney sent to Random House Publishing Group, requesting a reversion of rights in order that I am able to re-issue my novel, Gingernsnaps.  This is an excerpt:

...We write on behalf of Authors Guild member Ms. Dolorys Welch-Tyson, author of the above- referenced work, with whom Ballantine Books, an imprint of Random House Inc., entered into a publishing agreement in 1997.  Ms. Welch-Tyson has informed us that she requested a reversion of rights for the above-referenced work in May 2009, but was never granted such by Ballantine.  

Since Ballantine has made clear that it has no intention of exploiting the above-referenced work in any  manner in the future, we ask that it revert rights to Ms. Welch-Tyson immediately. ....




You see?

Exploit: 1) To make use of selfishly or unethically: a country that exploited peasant labor. See Synonyms at manipulate. 2). A vulnerability in software that can be used for breaking security or otherwise attacking an Internet host over the network. The Ping O' Death is a famous exploit.

or, course there is always the other way of looking at it:

Exploit:
1) To employ to the greatest possible advantage: exploit one's talents; 2). To advertise; promote.

Should I call the cops, or what?



“…the need to examine, analyze the language we see and hear… for the connotations all too often diverge wildly from the denotations, and, if we are unaware of that, our thinking can be hijacked.”


                                                                       ~Jerry DeNuccio

Expat Angst: Why Occuppy Wall Street? Part 2...

...Or the 2,000,002nd Reason I Left!

"Bye Y'all"
painting by delorys welch-tyson

Let me pick up where I left off…


Now, when there are two paychecks in a household a family unit might develop an erroneously inflated sense of economic worth. Suddenly the family finds that they are paying outrageous prices for small, often unnecessary things. The traffic suddenly decides to bear surrealist prices for flotsam and jetsum: whether it’s a ten-buck cup of coffee or a one bedroom apartment facing an alleyway in Manhattan for $4,000,000. The family begins to believe they are entitled to things that no longer have the value they had in their parents’ generation. No one is going to sell you an overpriced house or apartment to you if you are unwilling to buy it. It’s quite simple really. It simply requires a collective American and realistic philosophy regarding what something is actually worth and why.

Where once, one could achieve a decent education for a moderate price at a State University or for free at a City University, now everyone is vying for an overpriced ivy league education in order to major in philosophy or basket weaving, then wonder why they can’t find employment when they graduate.

google image

Whose fault is this?

Perhaps one should look around, while occupying Wall Street, to see who really might be occupying their jobs if they can’t find they can’t land one in their chosen field.

I realize I’ve been absent from the United States for quite some time, but I remember that all of my professional service providers, whether they be lawyers, doctors, teachers, engineers, journalists, editors or bank employees were all college graduates. People with college degrees (usually some kind of liberal arts endeavor) who worked for retail establishments were all occupying temporary gigs until they could figure out what profession they would pursue. I’m assuming they were all American people. Of course I never checked their birth certificates…so who knows.

Perhaps I’ve just been gone too long. I have no idea what my American brethren are talking about, anymore.

**Perhaps I should just find a venue where they’re trending, to grow my knowledge of things going viral so that I can offer more transparency to my dissed homies!

**(See my blog post: Ugly Words and Jacked-Up Concepts)

Expat Angst: Why Occupy Wall Street?

Recently I received a letter from a male friend in response to a blog I wrote concerning the precarious state of the European Union. My friend, a native New Yorker, is an educator, activist and Fulbright scholar and has for decades lived on the West Coast, in the San Fancisco Bay area. Here is an excerpt from his correspondence:


“I'm not sure what steps concealed the deconstruction of the middle class in Europe, if there has been such a deconstruction; but I know this one for the US. First we added a second working adult to the definition of middle class - so that two incomes were needed to produce the lifestyle previously accomplished with one. Then we offset flattened salaries with housing inflation so that the middle class could maintain once again the same lifestyle by borrowing off of its housing. And we lowered the costs of most everyday products by having them made in places where people earn only a couple of bucks a day for their labor. All the time, the share of the assets owned by those at the top, whose tax burden we steadily reduced to the point of starving government.”

This is my response:

When I was growing up in a moderately middle class black American family in New York City, my parents and their peers lived with a particular philosophy.

Although, both of my parents worked, my mother remained a homemaker until the last of her children reached school age. There were three of us. Their philosophy was that in a family, the role of the father’s income was to determine the standard of living in a family; the wife’s income would contribute to the quality of life. You see, this way, if one were to loose his/her job, the other could be able to kick for the duration, with minimum and workable adjustments in its day-to -day standard of living requirements.

In addition, the philosophy was that a family should never purchase a home where both full salaries would be required in order to qualify for a mortgage. This would often mean that one have to live in Brooklyn instead of Manhattan, Stanford, instead of Greenwich, Pasadena instead of Beverly Hills, Oakland instead of Sausalito, if you understand my meaning. This way, one wouldn’t accumulate unnecessary overhead, thus limiting the economical mobility of the family which the mother’s additional income could provide. The mother’s income was to be used primarily for quality of life issues such as planning for higher education for the children and also for the cultural enrichment of their intellectual and spiritual growth.

My family’s philosophy evolved in a culture… a black American culture… where historically both the female and the male worked outside the home for its survival. (Of course, I realize that I’m talking basically about my own family and their peers, not the general American community, black, white or other.)

When the American male ethnic majority, through their women’s coercive tactics, reluctantly gave into their demands for the right to work for economic compensation, no theory was put in place as to how this would work in order to maintain the financial equilibrium of a family unit.

A backlash then ensued which granted women unequal, inferior, pay for equal work and at the same time required that in order to achieve a decent standard of living it would be necessary to find access to more than one paycheck for each housing unit, in most areas of the United States..

Would you like me to continue?

Blaxpat Quote for November: Living Abroad

Some have said that, as a foreigner, it's difficult making friends abroad. This is what I tell them:

"The two most misused words in the entire English vocabulary are love and friendship. A true friend would die for you, so when you start trying to count them on one hand, you don't need any fingers."
                                                                                                     ~ Larry Flynt


Alors...bon séjour!